But for me, it does exist.
Today I made the 8-hour drive back to NJ and it was one of the worst car rides ever. Not weather or traffic-wise but emotionally. Don't get me wrong, I love my life. I just think I'm living it in the wrong place. I wish I could just pick everything up and take it there... Beau, my family, my friends, transplant them all.
I won't lie to you guys, I cried. I cried last night thinking about leaving. I cried this morning before leaving. Oh and I bawled when I got home and plopped on my couch.
I do not want to be here.
But how? How do you just pick up your belongings, leaving things you love behind? This is where I grew up. It's all I've known the past 24 years. How do you just... go?
I know it will one day happen and I hope that day is sooner rather than later. God give me the strength to make that leap. To make my life what I want - what I need - it to be.